Pathfinder (2007)

Indians vs. Vikings, who will win?
Not the audience, that's for sure. Obviously inspired by the director's days playing with his plastic Vikings and Indians on the living room carpet rather than historical research, Pathfinder isn't even enjoyably brain-dead. The cinematography is murky, the action scenes lack rhythm, and the blood and guts (not to mention nudity) quotient is disappointingly low for an R-rated film. Although this film apparently got bad press before it was even released, the critical dogpiling it received was justified, unlike the extremely underrated 13th Warrior. See it or the other Pathfinder, a Norwegian film from 1987 which supposedly was the inspiration for this piece of dreck, instead.

The decline of western civilization, part deux
Message in a bottle: "to Gunnar, from your father, Gunnar

Gunnar, this is your father Gunnar with some bad news. I never told you that you were adopted. Truth be told, you are the unholy offspring of a Finn trollop and an Orc. When I sent you on your mission to the New Land for settlement you were not to take 3 dragonships of Bezerkers, only one. You inadvertently left your coastal village defenseless. No bezerkers, no weapons, no horses,...nothing is left except the women slated for ship#2 and the food for ship#3.

The other day 3 canoes of 1000 braves from the New Land arrived at our shores. We were defenseless against their evil whistles and strange pipesmoke. Those Vikings still in our village found those braves attractive in their indecent leggings and flowery chit-chat, I fear the loss of ferocity and Odin knows what else!.

Where is Ingol the Eye-Gouger, Rigmul the Roaster, Bifron the Beheader, Tamshul the Tounge-taker, Sontar the Slasher, Clymax the Cleaver, and all those needed to defend our village in our time of need?
YOU have them ALL you ungrateful lout!!!" 'G'"

Hey, this movie is so wacky...unintentionally so. It even includes a scene where the hero escapes his Viking captors by using a Viking warshield as a snow-coaster and rides it down a mountainside while several Bezerkers in full Viking armor including maces(?) pursue him on snow sleds (ala James Bond)!
The Indian tribes are presented as the "Great Brown Hope" and the Vikings as the most EVIL bunch of louts this side of Valhalla. Mean'ole Gunnar even wears a necklace of human fingers (what-a-guy!).

Ironically, the director's commentary states how the Vikings portrayed are "100% Vikings". What a bunch of bunk!!! The director even went so far as to have the Vikings' speak Icelandic (supposedly) with english subtitles!

However, all bs aside, the movie is fun to watch...just leave your brain at the door...this is a weird flick! Drink plenty of Mead before, during and after (you'll need it).

Fast Moving and Riveting Story
I hadn't heard of this movie and saw it by chance on cable. I found it to be well constructed, fast moving, and riveting. Genre wise it reminded my of 300, so I did a little research and found that this story too has its genesis in the Dark Horse Comics.

I've seen this film several times now, and would recommend it, if for nothing else than a way to get a Saturday Night action film fix.